By Miles Layton

EDENTON — On the night of Dec. 23, 1975, a young Marine veteran lay unconscious on the floor of a restaurant near Philadelphia’s Schuylkill Expressway, having lost enough blood to require four transfusions. His wife had just given birth to their first son a month earlier. He was 28 years old, a professional bartender, and by his own account, a man heading toward an early grave.

Fifty years later, Melvin Tatem stood before the Edenton-Chowan Chamber of Commerce as its Humanitarian of the Year.

The chamber presented Tatem with the honor at its annual banquet, recognizing a man who has spent decades pouring himself — his time, his presence, his faith — into the lives of children, grieving families, and anyone who crosses his path in the small city he now calls home. Tatem, 78, accepts the recognition with characteristic humility.

“Whatever God has given me, it’s not for me,” he said. “It’s to help somebody else. Because somebody helped me one day.”

Meeting Melvin was a breath of fresh air to this weary soul — thanks for listening, inspiring and sharing your message of hope and faith with me.

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The Night Everything Changed

Tatem was born and raised in Elizabeth City and enlisted in the United States Marine Corps in February 1968, training at Parris Island, SC, before shipping off to Vietnam, where he was wounded. Returning home without a job, he eventually made his way to Allentown, Pa., where he built a life — working 32 years as a civil draftsman for Pennsylvania Power and Light Company, raising three children with his wife, Jacqueline, and tending bar on the side.

The bartending, he says with a rueful smile, came with occupational hazards.

“You know what a bartender likes to do? One for you, two for me.”

By the end of 1975, the drinking had nearly killed him. He suffered from a bleeding ulcer, passed out for 20 minutes, returned home, and went to the hospital, where he had 85 % of his stomach removed. Tatem says a scripture he had heard in church broke through.

“John 3:16: ‘For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in Him shall not perish but have everlasting life.’ I said, God, I can’t do it anymore. I’m sick and sick of being sick.”

That night, he says, his life turned on its axis. He leans on 2 Corinthians 5:17 to explain what happened next: “If any man be in Christ, he’s a new creature. Old things have passed away, and all things have become new.”

“Ever since that day, I said God, I’m going to serve you the rest of my life. I’m going to love humanity no matter what the situation or circumstances. The joy of the Lord is my strength.”

From Pews to Prison Yards

Tatem didn’t wait for a pulpit to start serving. Carrying what he called his “Marine Corps Bible,” he began visiting prisons, nursing homes, and migrant worker camps — not as a pastor, but simply as a man grateful to be alive.

“I call it SSS — I’m saved, I’m sure, I’m serving,” he said. “I start serving. I was going to the prison, nursing home, migrant workers, wherever there was ministry. I was gone. I wasn’t pastoring. I was doing it because of the love of God in my heart.”

God, he says, eventually elevated him. In 1996, he became the third pastor of Grace Deliverance Baptist Church in Bethlehem, PA, leading the congregation for 22 years — longer than both of his predecessors combined. Under his leadership, the church expanded from a 4,000-square-foot building to an 11,000-square-foot facility, paid for in cash after more than $1 million in renovations. He developed a discipleship school, launched outreach ministries, and led mission trips to Africa and Haiti, as well as teams to the areas affected by Hurricane Katrina.

“The heartbeat of God is for His people — mission,” he said. “To be able to go out locally, I call it Jerusalem, Judea, Samaria, uttermost parts of the earth, sharing the good news of Jesus Christ.” (Acts 1:8)

Coming Home

In March 2019, after 22 years at the helm, Tatem felt what he describes as a clear divine instruction: it was time to go home. He and Jacqueline — married 52 years this May — returned to North Carolina. They settled in Edenton, drawn by the waterfront and the quiet pull of family roots. Jacqueline is also from Elizabeth City.

Tatem had no intention of planting another church. After building something that large, he says, he wanted to be useful wherever he was needed.

“I didn’t want to pastor here,” he said. “But we want to make ourselves useful to the body of Christ — wherever we can help a church, a ministry, a club, whatever we can do.”

He helps his brother, Elder Wilbert Tatem, who has pastored Soul Chain Ministries on Shannonhouse Road for 16 years. 

A Servant Among Children 

For roughly five of his seven years in Edenton, Tatem has volunteered at the Boys and Girls Club on a near-daily basis — taking out trash and running a spirituality group twice a month. He also volunteers at D.F. Walker Elementary and White Oak. “I go outside to recess. I do the whole campus,” he said. “I push the swing; I talk to them. And then I get a chance to communicate with the teachers — to listen to the teacher, because sometimes nobody listens to them.” I volunteer at Chowan Middle School at Hope Academy.

The philosophy behind his approach is simple, and he has refined it through years of practice.

“You have to form a connection with them before you can correct them,” he said. “You’ve got to build relationships with these kids because sometimes as adults, we want to try to correct them, but we can’t correct them because we don’t have any connection with them.”

The results, he says, show up in grocery store aisles.

“When I see them out in the community — ‘Hello, Mr. Tatem!  They respond to you because they know who you are.”

He also performs grief ministry — sitting with people who have lost loved ones and helping them process loss in a culture that often rushes them along. He teaches classes and does workshops.

“People want to talk because nobody listened to them when they were talking about grief,” he said. “They had the mindset, ‘Get over it — they’ve been dead three weeks.’ But they don’t know how.”

Life Still in Motion

At 78, Tatem participates in the Albemarle Senior Games locally from February to May and in the State Games in September in the Raleigh area. He participates in over 25 different events. He frames his longevity in the same five-part framework he uses for everything else: SPERM “You’ve got to keep yourself Spiritual, Physical, Emotional, Relational, and Mentally strong. In every one of those areas, you’ve got to be fulfilled.”

He reads scripture daily, memorizes passages, and still wrestles honestly with his own shortcomings.

“Yes, I make mistakes,” he said. “But I have a God that I can go to, that I can repent of.”

When asked if he is afraid of anything, he answered with 2 Timothy 1:7 on his lips: “For God hath not given me the spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind.”

His favorite verse, he said without hesitation, is Romans 1:16: “I am not ashamed of the gospel of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, because it’s the power of God to change people’s lives.”

He was a professional bartender once. Now, he says he still likes to shake things up — just differently.

“I still like to shake up stuff — shake up souls for Jesus.”

Other honorees recognized at the chamber banquet included: Business Person of the Year, Steve Taylor; Small Business of the Year, Christian Book Seller; Organization of the Year, Main Street Edenton; Volunteer of the Year, Kathy Masters; Community Champions, John A. Holmes High School staff, faculty and students; Main Street Champion, Karen Foley; Tourism Award, Edenton Farmer’s Market; and Mayor’s Award for Environmental Excellence, Celeste Maus. More on these honorees will appear in future stories.