BY MILES LAYTON
This week’s obituary report includes coverage of two funerals – beloved native son Jim Parrish and Air Force fighter pilot Les Kersey. A list of the past week’s obituaries appears at the end of this story.
Why write about funerals?
Answer – to share the stories about two extraordinary men and perhaps provide insight into faith in God’s plan since death is a part of all our lives.
Born and raised in Chowan County
Though Jim Parrish passed away Tuesday after a tragic accident, his legacy of kindness and love for others will echo an eternity.
Hundreds of people from all walks of life – public officials, school teachers and coaches, farmers, Aces’ students and even one clean-shaven journalist attended Parrish’s funeral Saturday at Edenton Baptist Church to remember the man who loved his family and community. The church’s huge sanctuary’s overflow crowd was directed to the fellowship hall that became so packed that men stood lining the walls so that others could have a seat. A giant television broadcasted the funeral service from the sanctuary.
Reverend Koby Strawser set the stage – Parrish was 48; how tragedy can happen to good people.
“This past Sunday, I preached a sermon on why bad things happen to good people, and Jim was here and he was sitting right there, and I hope that somehow or another the spirit spoke to him and he remembered those words that sometimes tragedy cannot be explained, and sometimes horrific things happen to really, really good people.”
Strawser continued, “I also hope that he heard in that sermon that in those moments, he wouldn’t be by himself, that the spirit of God would be with him holding his hand. And so family, I hope that those words bring you maybe just a little bit of comfort knowing that in those times of tragedy that God didn’t abandon him. The Lord was right there with him. And I hope you’ll know that too.”
Skipping ahead in the service, these words from Reverend Gary Stanley’s eulogy hit true, close to home in the hearts of so many grieving people. Stanley had known Parrish for many, many years, a relationship that started when Stanley was Parrish’s youth minister. Indeed, one sensed that Stanley’s voice was strained with emotion as he talked about his friend and the shock of losing him.
“Our hearts are broken. The pain of friends and family reaches deep into the abyss of despair. We remain in shock. We are numb. Some might ask, many have asked, why, but there are no answers. What I do believe is that God is not the cause of this tragedy. There’s a tear in the fabric of our lives, a tear that leaves our hearts crushed. However, God promises us that this tear will someday be restored, restored as the grand gates of heaven are waiting to reunite us all.”
Stanley continued, “We don’t know what to do. We feel lost. We don’t know what to say. We feel empty. We might not even know how to pray. Are we even capable of praying when we don’t have the words. Our tears and our sobs, our silence and our blank stares translate into unspeakable prayers of the heart – God knows our hearts and our profound sadness.”
Stanley said Parrish was greeted in heaven.
“Our God is a God of restoration and peace. Yes, our pain is real and we did not ask for it, nor do we deserve this deep part. But in this despair, I pray that at some point you can find comfort in knowing that Jim was swiftly ushered into the loving arms of God. In the blink of an eye, Jim was greeted by God with open loving arms.”
Parrish’s teenage daughter Emma shared stories about the caring man her father was.
“I want to say thank you to everyone for the support. If you can measure the impact he’s had on the community of the paper towels, fried chicken, and the people in their seats today, you clearly see the type of man my dad is — To some, a true legend, hard-working, fearless, corny, driven, and full of life. Those are the words I have chosen to represent my dad. He had this way of making everyone feel like they mattered. Whether it was a very aggressive man hug with one of his good buddies, a pat on the back after a game, or just a helping hand at any time he needed it, he was always there.”
Parrish had an impact on all those lucky enough to know him – he knew no strangers.
“His bright squinting smile lit up every room he walked into, and you couldn’t help but join in with his loud wheezing laugh whether you knew him as dad, Coco Jim, Mr. Jim, Jimmy P or Coach Jim, it was truly a privilege to know him. He impacted everyone in his life. He knew no strangers. Everyone was his good friend. And right now I know he’s up there wearing what Wolfpack red, listening to Kid Rock, watching football and enjoying a Miller Light while eating a salad from the pub, just as happy as he could be.”
Emma continued, “That was my dad. Always find enjoyment in the little things, always embracing the moment. We will miss him dearly. We can take comfort in knowing that his legacy lives on through each of us, through the advice he gave me, even though I never wanted it. Through the corny jokes he shared and through the love he gave so freely, you’ll always be our MVP. Dad, don’t worry me and Jimbo will take care of mama. Rest easy. We love you.”
Parrish’s teenage son Jimbo spoke of the man he admired, respected and loved.
“When I think of my dad, I think of a saying by (former NCSU basketball coach) Jimmy Valvano about survive and advance. This perfectly sums up our life together, overcoming challenges and always moving forward. My dad had a way of making everyone feel like a hundred bucks, always handing out compliments to everyone he saw, and he was deeply loved by so many.”
Parrish was deeply devoted to his family – Jimbo shared several anecdotes including one about his dad’s competitive nature and volleyball tossed toward an imaginary goal.
“In dull moments, he would turn anything into a competitive game. Our favorite family spot is my me-mama and pop pop’s house in Nags Head. Next to a house is a parking lot with a community trash can. My dad started a family game where we would throw a volleyball from a porch into a trash can. I don’t know how you do that, but you just do… I love him. I’ll miss him forever. Rest easy big man. I got it from here. At least I’ll try.”
Top Gun Aviator joins God’s Air Force
Family, friends and the community paid tribute to Colonel Les Kersey’s life Saturday at St. Paul’s Episcopal Church. Public officials and familiar faces from all walks of life filled the pews inside the historic church. If Les’ last name sounds familiar, it’s because his wife, Patty, was a former county commissioner and trailblazer, too.
According to Kersey’s obituary, a graduate of the Citadel, Kersey was commissioned in the Air Force and quickly distinguished himself as a skilled Fighter Pilot earning recognition for his bravery and dedication during his early service in the Vietnam War flying combat in the F-4 Phantom. During Kersey’s first tour in Southeast Asia, at Korat, Royal Thai Airforce Base in Thailand, he was selected to be a member of the Tiger Fast Forward Air Controller Program (Tiger FAC) whose mission was to intercept and destroy enemy targets.
During Kersey’s 26 years of service, he was assigned to a variety of positions at Base, Major Command and the Pentagon. He commanded the 23rd Tactical Fighter Squadron at Spangdahlem AB, Germany, and subsequently was selected to be the Director of Operations for HQ United States Air Forces in Europe.
Among his many medals and commendations, Kersey was awarded the Legion of Merit, Distinguished Flying Cross, Meritorious Service Medal and Air Medal with numerous oak leaf clusters.
Remembrances of this flying ace’s life and its impact on others was shared by his daughter Cammie Kersey Johnston, neighbor Alex Kehayes and family friend Flora Hall Davis.
A former county commissioner, Kehayes was a neighbor and one of Les’ good friends. Kehayes shared his respect for Les’ military service – he flew jets at low altitudes and 500+ mph over enemy territory in Cambodia during the Vietnam War. Les wasn’t just a top flight aviator – a combat veteran of the highest order.
“I did not appreciate the steel and the intensity of that kind of combat until I read the book (about fighter pilots). Les never really went in detail about this. I knew about it … this was over in Cambodia. If you were shot down over Vietnam, there was a chance you would go to the Hanoi Hilton. Cambodia didn’t have the Hanoi Hilton because if you were shot down in Cambodia and you were executed. That was the theater of war, not Vietnam, but Cambodia.”
When Les returned, the Pentagon wanted to give Les a desk job – that’s not something he wanted, Kehayes said, so he opted to serve in Germany, the front lines during the Cold War.
“So the (Pentagon) said, ‘OK, we’ve got a squadron over in Germany that needs to be taken but really proficiency is low. How about shaking up the squadron.’ So Les went and he told me that he said to the pilots, ‘It was a Monday — if the balloon goes up tomorrow, Tuesday, only half of you will be sitting here on a Wednesday.’ So this is the experienced fighter pilot telling me, John Bozo, it’s time to get serious and shape up.”
Davis talked about her family’s close ties with Les and Patty Kersey. She talked about the Kersey’s journey to Chowan County from military service and duty at the Pentagon; how the two families got to know each other as the Kerseys built their home on 10 acres bordering the Yeopim River – a simple business transaction that turned into friendship.
“Since Les’ death, I have reflected on the last 30 years and the overarching theme that I have come to know is the goodness of God. I’m of the opinion that some of God’s greatest gifts in life are friends and friendships and the sense of purpose and belonging that they give us.”
Johnston described her dad as a dedicated veteran, talented builder, voracious reader, and patient man who adored dogs and hated squirrels, which he dubbed “tree rats”—when they would eat off bird feeders, Kersey would spray them with the hose from his porch.
“Though I miss my dad everyday, I know he’s up there in the cabin right on reading his Aviation Week magazine, sitting and surrounded by all his dogs. I know who he, I know where he, the reason why I wanted to share all these little insights into my dad with you is so that the next time you get to spend a quiet afternoon book or you’re considering tackling a seemingly impossible project or just scratching your dog’s head, enjoying perfectly grilled steak … then smile and think of him.”
Reverend Melody Perdue spoke to Kersey’s leadership ability – a shepherd who cared about protecting the flock.
“Shepherds had to be strong and dependable, vigilant and practical. They had to be calm and steady because sheep were known to be anxious and fearful, easily scattered and prone to getting themselves in trouble. A shepherd had to steer an ornery group in the right direction and be a good judge of situations, circumstances, and people. And from everything that I’ve heard, Les modeled that in so many ways.”
Perdue continued, “I got to speak on the phone with Les’s friend Eric who served under his command and he shared how so many in the command trusted and respected Les. Yes, Les was tough, but he had to be because so many put their trust in him to make the good and right decisions. And not only did many trust Les to lead them in command, but they would often go to him for personal advice and direction for their lives. People know a good leader, a good shepherd when they encounter one.”
“You’ve known one in Les and Les knew one in Jesus, the good shepherd. God speaks to each person in a unique way. And for some of that voice that call is, is more instinctual rather than maybe audible or obvious and inner knowing, if you will, of the right thing to do. And I have no doubt that Les knew that voice.”
Before concluding this week’s obituary report, we’re going to end with this Scripture passage (John 14:1-6) that bears repeating.
“Do not let your hearts be troubled. You believe in God; believe also in me. 2 My Father’s house has many rooms; if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you? 3 And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. 4 You know the way to the place where I am going.”
5 Thomas said to him, “Lord, we don’t know where you are going, so how can we know the way?”
6 Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.
Here is the week’s obituary report for people (the folks we’re aware of) who have passed away in Chowan, Perquimans, Tyrrell counties and those parts of Washington County between the Sound bridge and Creswell.
We offer FREE local obituaries as we believe it is a service and privilege to help families document their loss and inform friends and others of pending services.
If folks have other names to add to the weekly obituary report, please send the names and the obit links to the funeral homes to mileslayton1969@gmail.com. We publish the weekly obit report late Saturday/early Sunday.
Obituary listings:
Catherine “Cathie” Hoskins
Dec 24, 1951 – Mar 1, 2025
Catherine “Cathie” Hoskins Thompson passed away on Saturday, March 1, 2025.
Link: https://www.millerfhc.com/obituaries/catherine-thompson
William Douglas McPherson, Jr.
Nov 23, 1943 – Mar 24, 2025
William Douglas McPherson, Jr., 81, of Elizabeth City, NC, passed away on Monday, March 24, 2025, in Sentara Norfolk General Hospital.
Link: https://www.millerfhc.com/obituaries/william-mcpherson-jr
Connie Hollowell Slades
Dec 2, 1952 – Mar 24, 2025
Connie Priscilla Hollowell Slades, 72, 1324 Greenhall Road, died March 24, 2025, in ECU Health Chowan Hospital.
Link: https://www.millerfhc.com/obituaries/connie-slades
Dean Allan Engelhardt
Apr 8, 1954 – Mar 22, 2025
LCDR Dean Allan Engelhardt, U.S. Navy, Retired, 70, of Hertford, NC, died Saturday, March 22, 2025, in his home after a brief battle with sarcoma cancer.
Link: https://www.millerfhc.com/obituaries/dean-engelhardt
Michelle Scheur Brown
Jul 19, 1959 – Mar 22, 2025
Michelle Scheuer Brown (Shelly), 65, passed away unexpectedly at her home on March 22, 2025.
Link: https://www.millerfhc.com/obituaries/michelle-brown
Sandra Ann Russ Ellenor
Jun 15, 1944 – Mar 21, 2025
Sandra Ann Russ Ellenor, 80 of 888 Hwy 37 North, Gates, NC. passed away Friday, March 21, 2025, in her home where she was being cared for by family.
Link: https://www.millerfhc.com/obituaries/sandra-ellenor
